The holiday season can bring as much stress as it does cheer, but navigating holiday stress with healthy boundaries and coping mechanisms is within reach. Between the social pressures, family gatherings, and endless to-do lists, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. The key to maintaining your peace lies in developing practical coping skills that help you stay centered in the chaos. Whether it’s deep breathing to calm your nerves, redirecting jittery energy through simple physical techniques, or slowing down with intentional moments, these tools can make navigating the holidays smoother and more enjoyable. Let’s dive into some easy, effective coping strategies to keep you grounded and festive this season.
So then how do you tackle of these situations and then some, without losing yourself like Clark?
Coping skills.
The easiest thing for people to do, yet, the most under-utilized tool that people have access too. Most of them are easy and simple enough that you can do it without others realizing what you are doing. The trick with any coping skill is that you do have to practice it. Just like a sport, you can’t expect for it to work or to be good at it if you only engage in it when needed. For those that say, I’ve tried, they don’t work for me. I challenge on whether or not you have actually engaged in it, especially seeing are there are more than 1,000+ coping skills out there to try.
- Deep breathing/ box breathing: Either by through your mouth or nose, and not like a bull either. The purpose of this is to focus on the time it takes to inhale, hold and exhale. The purpose of this is to help decrease your heart rate, and potentially help you from making that impulsive comeback to your brother as you will have to complete it first which should give you time to think before you speak. If you’re new to this, try drawing a square (box) or a triangle on your leg with your finger. The shape doesn’t have to be big but is used more as a centering piece to help you keep track of what you are doing, it can be easily achieved by just using one finger, so that others would think you just have your hand on your lap. When you start with the first line, inhale and count to 5 in your head slowly (think 1-1,000, 2 – 1,000, 3 – 1,000, 4-1,000 5- 1,000). Hold the breath for the count of 5 as you make the second line and exhale for 5 while you draw the last line on your leg. If you do a box/square, the last line you hold your breath for 5. The goal is to reach up to a count of 10.
- Pull/Press: This one involves your hands and may not be as inconspicuous as the last one, however can be very beneficial for those that feel jittery, angry or anxious. For the press sensation, place your hands together flat (think of a person that does a prayer) and then press with all that you can without making it obvious on your face. I find that most people end up pressing the heels of their hands together more than their fingers, but it is whatever feels best for you. Hold it between 10 – 15 seconds. For the pull sensation, cup your hands together, one over top the other, and pull them in opposite directions, hard, but without letting them come apart (think of a choir singer that has their hands in front of themselves while singing). Again, hold of 10 -15 seconds or until however long you feel comfortable. Try both of them and decide which one feels the most comfortable for you and keeps you centered. If your hands are full and aren’t able to do this, find a wall and press into it with your back. Again you are going with the sensation to help channel the feeling into another part of your body and to work through the uncomfortable feeling you are having.
- Drink cold water: this one is pretty self-explanatory. Drinking something cold when feeling a heighten emotion helps decreasing that feeling. The other benefit – you can’t respond to someone while you’re busy drinking a glass of water. This does not mean chugging a beer or some other liquor drink. You are to drink it slowly. Again the action is to help slow down the negative reaction and give ourselves time to collect our thought before we go flying off the handle
Again, just because something can be done this holiday season, doesn’t mean it has to be done. Finding gratification in the simple things the holiday season can be the most rewarding. Your kids, wallet (and sanity) will thank you.
Katie Kernus is a LPC-S, NCC with a private practice located in Virginia. She currently provides therapy services virtually and some in-home services based on location. She has a history of working with children to adults, dealing with issues such as depression, anxiety, addiction, life/career changes/ transitions, school issues, veterans, military/ professional services trauma, grief and illnesses.
